My life with cancer

Woke up very weak and tired.  Not really able to stay awake.  Emotionally crushed to be feeling his way.  I’m supposed to start feeling better!  Went in to see Dr. Trillo as planned.  My bloodwork looks good; the white count’s back up above 8, and my hemoglobin looks good (at 12.1 I think I saw).  He’s concerned about the white plaques in my mouth (thrush) and also some of the yellow tinge to my salivary secretions (bacterial infection).  So he put me on amoxicillin and fluconazole via PEG tube.  He also suggested I get some fluids and get started with the antibiotics IV.  Worked for me, so I stayed for a few hours to get all my fluids and drugs.  Towards the end of my therapy, I put on a special dry heaving, mucus vomiting show.  Had a hard time stopping it, but eventually did and ended up with yet another antinauseant at my disposal.  Spent the rest of the evening in bed coming in and out of sleep.  Did “eat” a little right before bed, so I could get the anti-fungal in me.  Felt a little better in the evening and hoping for better tomorrow. 🙂

Felt a little more tired than normal today, but nothing too horrible. Spent most of the day hiding in my room with a new book to keep from not overdoing it physically.  Overall not a bad day.  Took some pictures of my neck.  Looks pretty bad although no serious burns.  The radiation tech actually said after the last treatment that my skin doesn’t look bad at all.  Good to know.

Woke up refreshed and sweat free.  Still pretty tired, but not quite as bad as it’s been.  Don’t really feel nauseous and am holding food down to prove it.  Did quite a bit of laundry and even went to see a movie with my friends.  No problems staying awake through the film, but any socialization afterwards was going to be a little more than I could handle, so I went home to take a rest.  Able to drink okay, although it does cause coughing fits sometimes.  Oh well, now just waiting for my voice to return…

Severe fatigue, cold sweats, and unpredictable nausea both yesterday and today.  Probably the worst days I’ve had throughout the whole treatment.  Spent both days in bed, although did start feeling a little better tonight.  Ate little, did nothing, tried not to think about what comes next.

Completed, finished, done.  All therapy is over.  Now the long road to healing.  I was so excited that I couldn’t hardly sleep last night.  The morning went well with our meeting although I was falling asleep.  Had to crash right after I got back home.  Waking up in cold sweats.  That pretty much continued for the rest of the day.  So off to sleep, rest, and heal. 🙂

Well, the morning was pretty terrible as the patches were wearing off.  I did sleep well, so that was good, but that was about the only good thing in the am.  Went in to have the shot for my low white count to Dr. Trillo’s office.  That was about as pleasant as most shots, except of course, that I love the staff.  Scheduled my next appointment with him and it’s looking like he’ll be seeing me weekly till I’m healed.  Had a vomiting episode after my lunch meal – throat was just too sore and my gag reflex kicked in and then it was over.  Had to sleep it off.

Went in for radiation and saw Dr. Greenberg for the last time until end of April.  He told me that I should expect any improvement in the first 7-10 days, but I will start feeling better in 3-4 weeks and should be pretty much back to “normal” in 2 months.  We shall see.  Felt quite good in the evening and helped John out a bit with the kiddos.  Mama left seeing that I was doing okay and it wasn’t going to continue storming in the near future.

Hoping for a good morning tomorrow, so that I can be cognizant at the meeting for Marcus’ future classroom.  Keeping fingers crossed.

I was very tired at chemo today, but it did go smoothly.  My white count was a little low at 2.8, so I have to go back tomorrow for a shot to build those up.  Everything else was fine though, so no signs of infections in the mouth.  Got my “I can fight cancer” t-shirt to commemorate this end of my treatment.

My radiation went well this afternoon and as they pointed out, only 2 more to go.  They moved them to later in the afternoon for the next 2 days, but having nothing to do it doesn’t really matter.  It’s mama’s turn to tote me around, so she’s hanging out and playing on her iPad while I rest and we await my various appointments.

My mouth is becoming very painful again, but I think it’s because the patches are not holding on very well this time.  I’m going to be covering them while showering in the near future to try to keep them on a little better.  I think I’m gonna suffer through tonight and then put on new patches after showering tomorrow.  Hopefully, this will make it possible for me to function on Wednesday morning for a meeting.

Feeling much better this morning with 100 mcg fentanyl on board, just like I thought I would.  Needed to be more here, since kids are coming back from Spring Break at my parents’ tonight.  Had to finish up with the dressers in their rooms and finish tidying up upstairs.  Turns out it’s a good thing I did because my mom may be spending some nights here if the weather is ugly.  So I did end up doing some work on the computer too and was just right down extra super productive today.  Got my EOBs from the insurance from last weekend at the hospital, and it’s actually costing me next to nothing.  Our health insurance is the best!  We’re finally using it, but it rocks.  My ambulance ride to the hospital was fully covered, if that tells you anything. 🙂

Suffering through another day with just 75 mcg fentanyl on board.  Basically stayed in bed all day trying to fall asleep, so that I wouldn’t feel the pain.  Tomorrow should be better, since I’ll be adding a 25 mcg patch tonight.

My days are alternating between lying in bed or watching TV from the couch.  Felt a little better today, so it was a couch day.  John’s keeping up with feeding me, do all I have to do is just be here.